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UPDATE: She just texted me. She said she was sorry and feels now that she overreacted (after talking it over with a GF). She asked me to forgive her and asked if we could still be friends and maybe hang out again.
I replied: I greatly appreciate you taking the time to set things straight. I would be lying if I said your words last night weren't extremely insulting. You said a number of things to me in the short time I have known you that clearly led me to believe you had a ribald sense of humor. And I never in my wildest dreams thought that joke would in any way offend you. In fact, I apologize if it caused you any discomfort whatsoever. And of course I forgive you. No hard feelings on my end at all. Though I think this whole episode may be an indication that we should go our separate ways. I wish you nothing but the best in life and enjoyed meeting you. Take care.
To which she replied: Fuck you.
So... Psycho chick verified. I stand vindicated and it feels good!
Kudos to the few guys in this thread who read this situation for what it was.
So I was pricing dog food in a supermarket in expectation of potentially buying a puppy for my kids. A girl was picking up some stuff for her own pup. We began to chat. I asked her if she might be willing to give me some tips on housebreaking as I have never done it before. She said sure. We exchanged numbers.
From a physical standpoint this female was not my "type". I am into girly-girls and this woman was more akin to a WMMA fighter. Tatted up and a little tough looking. But she did a nice job with her makeup and had what was obviously a fairly expensive nail job. And she smelled good. So, I guess, sort of a mixed bag.
I never reached out because, again, I had some conflicting feelings about my level of attraction to her. But about a week later she texted me. Just shared some brief, random shit - What she had had for lunch, sent me a pic of her (adorable) dog and a pic of her kids. She asked me if I had bought the puppy yet. I said "no" and that was about it.
Giving the whole thing some more thought I decided to text her the following day. I asked if she would like to come over to my place some night that week to hang out and talk. She said absolutely and showed up two nights later. We had some drinks and became more familiar with one another.
We talked about a range of issues but for the purpose of this post I am only going to share the pertinent piece. In telling me about her job she mentions that there was an older married guy she worked with whose nickname for her was "slutbags". He also called her "whore money" (a play on her name, Harmony). He also shared X rated memes with her on his phone almost daily. She told me how hilarious she found it all. Said she took no offense and was actually planning to eventually go on a fishing trip with this guy and several other men from work. She said she grew up as an army brat and knew how to be "one of the boys".
So, whatever. In my mind she loses points with this. But at least, I think to myself, she's not the kind of crazy, PC chick who is going to run to her HR because a man in her office compliments her dress. Maybe she's too far in the opposite extreme. If nothing else I feel like I have an accurate sense of where her boundaries are.
The evening ended. I made no moves and was not even slightly flirtatious. I was still completely on the fence about wanting to risk opening up that can of worms with this particular girl. Though she did strike me as cool and down to earth. As a thank you for her having come over and provided me with some housebreaking tips I thought it would be nice to give her a little gift. She had told me her astrological sign (which happened to be mine) so I ordered her a nice scented Sagittarius candle from Amazon and had it shipped to her house.
Between the time I ordered the candle and the time it arrived she and I shared a few more texts - about our kids, our schedules, the shut down, etc. She sent me some pics of her house and her backyard. She sent me some pics of a new smoker she had bought and a bunch of ribs she was soaking in preparation for it.
Anyway, the day she gets the candle she texts me and writes: Thank you so much for the gift. It's perfect. You are so thoughtful.
Attempting to deflect from the praise I decide to inject some levity: You're welcome. A girl can always use another vibrator. lol
She replies with what I assumed was a confusion emoji.
I write: Does the candle smell as good as the description made it sound?
She replies: I don't know. I haven't lit it yet.
But then I hear nothing else from her. A couple days later I text her and ask if she is free to meet me in the park that afternoon for a walk. No reply. I call her and get her voicemail and leave a brief message a couple hours later. She never texts or calls me back.
The next day I do get a text from her: I want to let you know that I intentionally did not respond to you yesterday. I found your text to me about the gift disturbing. It really creeped me out. I don't know whatever gave you the idea that you could say something like that to me. Please respect that I no longer want to communicate with you. Please do not call or text me in the future.
I replied: So the woman who thinks being called "slutbags" and "whore money" is hysterical was offended by a vibrator joke? Whatever. Enjoy your candle.
I cannot tell you HOW LIVID I am over this. (Maybe the fact I am making this long fucking post about it is the evidence.) NO WOMAN in my adult life has EVER accused me of being even slightly inappropriate - much less creepy to the point that they somehow feared interaction with me. I simply cannot wrap my head around this. I just can't let it go.
Can anyone out there shed light? Any insights from the men of the Berry? Thanks for letting me unload.
I replied: I greatly appreciate you taking the time to set things straight. I would be lying if I said your words last night weren't extremely insulting. You said a number of things to me in the short time I have known you that clearly led me to believe you had a ribald sense of humor. And I never in my wildest dreams thought that joke would in any way offend you. In fact, I apologize if it caused you any discomfort whatsoever. And of course I forgive you. No hard feelings on my end at all. Though I think this whole episode may be an indication that we should go our separate ways. I wish you nothing but the best in life and enjoyed meeting you. Take care.
To which she replied: Fuck you.
So... Psycho chick verified. I stand vindicated and it feels good!
Kudos to the few guys in this thread who read this situation for what it was.
So I was pricing dog food in a supermarket in expectation of potentially buying a puppy for my kids. A girl was picking up some stuff for her own pup. We began to chat. I asked her if she might be willing to give me some tips on housebreaking as I have never done it before. She said sure. We exchanged numbers.
From a physical standpoint this female was not my "type". I am into girly-girls and this woman was more akin to a WMMA fighter. Tatted up and a little tough looking. But she did a nice job with her makeup and had what was obviously a fairly expensive nail job. And she smelled good. So, I guess, sort of a mixed bag.
I never reached out because, again, I had some conflicting feelings about my level of attraction to her. But about a week later she texted me. Just shared some brief, random shit - What she had had for lunch, sent me a pic of her (adorable) dog and a pic of her kids. She asked me if I had bought the puppy yet. I said "no" and that was about it.
Giving the whole thing some more thought I decided to text her the following day. I asked if she would like to come over to my place some night that week to hang out and talk. She said absolutely and showed up two nights later. We had some drinks and became more familiar with one another.
We talked about a range of issues but for the purpose of this post I am only going to share the pertinent piece. In telling me about her job she mentions that there was an older married guy she worked with whose nickname for her was "slutbags". He also called her "whore money" (a play on her name, Harmony). He also shared X rated memes with her on his phone almost daily. She told me how hilarious she found it all. Said she took no offense and was actually planning to eventually go on a fishing trip with this guy and several other men from work. She said she grew up as an army brat and knew how to be "one of the boys".
So, whatever. In my mind she loses points with this. But at least, I think to myself, she's not the kind of crazy, PC chick who is going to run to her HR because a man in her office compliments her dress. Maybe she's too far in the opposite extreme. If nothing else I feel like I have an accurate sense of where her boundaries are.
The evening ended. I made no moves and was not even slightly flirtatious. I was still completely on the fence about wanting to risk opening up that can of worms with this particular girl. Though she did strike me as cool and down to earth. As a thank you for her having come over and provided me with some housebreaking tips I thought it would be nice to give her a little gift. She had told me her astrological sign (which happened to be mine) so I ordered her a nice scented Sagittarius candle from Amazon and had it shipped to her house.
Between the time I ordered the candle and the time it arrived she and I shared a few more texts - about our kids, our schedules, the shut down, etc. She sent me some pics of her house and her backyard. She sent me some pics of a new smoker she had bought and a bunch of ribs she was soaking in preparation for it.
Anyway, the day she gets the candle she texts me and writes: Thank you so much for the gift. It's perfect. You are so thoughtful.
Attempting to deflect from the praise I decide to inject some levity: You're welcome. A girl can always use another vibrator. lol
She replies with what I assumed was a confusion emoji.
I write: Does the candle smell as good as the description made it sound?
She replies: I don't know. I haven't lit it yet.
But then I hear nothing else from her. A couple days later I text her and ask if she is free to meet me in the park that afternoon for a walk. No reply. I call her and get her voicemail and leave a brief message a couple hours later. She never texts or calls me back.
The next day I do get a text from her: I want to let you know that I intentionally did not respond to you yesterday. I found your text to me about the gift disturbing. It really creeped me out. I don't know whatever gave you the idea that you could say something like that to me. Please respect that I no longer want to communicate with you. Please do not call or text me in the future.
I replied: So the woman who thinks being called "slutbags" and "whore money" is hysterical was offended by a vibrator joke? Whatever. Enjoy your candle.
I cannot tell you HOW LIVID I am over this. (Maybe the fact I am making this long fucking post about it is the evidence.) NO WOMAN in my adult life has EVER accused me of being even slightly inappropriate - much less creepy to the point that they somehow feared interaction with me. I simply cannot wrap my head around this. I just can't let it go.
Can anyone out there shed light? Any insights from the men of the Berry? Thanks for letting me unload.
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