My 6 year old punched/hit someone at school today b/c......

TheNinja

TheNinja

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he got depantsed. Should I be upset with him or proud? I always tell him not to take crap from people but he also got in a little trouble for hitting the other kid. I mean, if you don't want to get hit, don't depants someone on the playground......lesson learned for everyone IMO.

I think maybe I should teach him a hard double leg takedown or a nice trip and throw instead of a hit/punch. At least with a takedown you can just pretend the kids were wrestling and playing at recess.
 
Depants? So his pants were down and someone snuck up and pulled them up?
 
Getting pants is part of being a kid unless it’s repeatedly happening I think he overreacted.
 
Maybe the other kid was confused on your kid's gender and was curious to find out
 
only a few years until the " my kid got arrested today" threads start
 
Dober4 said:
Getting pants is part of being a kid unless it’s repeatedly happening I think he overreacted.
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I agree with the first part but to be fair so too is punching the kid who did it part of being a kid.

Boys rough house (at least they used to) and that was a good thing. they also make sure doing things has a cost (you might get punched) and that was a good thing.

The reason we have all these youTube tough guys doing things like going up to Chris Cuomo and talking tough, when they are not, is because they grew up with no consequences for such actions.
 
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He sent the message to the whole playground, I doubt anyone will touch his pants again. I’d bet a dime to a doughnut he’ll be a shotcaller on the yard before the semester is out.
 
To be honest be was assaulted and defended himself imo. Unless it was a cold revenge sucker punch I'd say he did good.

The knee jerk reaction is to tell the child to find an adult mediator to find a peaceful resolution, but in that moment he's being physically attacked and there ain't no adult. In such a situation it's an appropriate response.

I guess the context is important.
 
MikeMcMann said:
I agree with the first part but to be fair so too is punching the kid who did it part of being a kid.

Boys rough house (at they used to) and that was a good thing. they also make sure doing things has a cost (you might get punched) and that was a good thing.

The reason we have all these youTube tough guys doing things like going up to Chris Cuomo and talking tough, when they are not, is because they grew up with no consequences for such actions.
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These are really good points. I mean it's not like they stabbed each other or had a long drawn out fight. They are learning life lessons......yes, it's OK to roughhouse around and be a boy, but, like you said, there are consequences for such actions and that's part of it too. To me this is really a non-issue for both sides that doesn't really require further adult intervention unless it's a constant issue between the 2 kids.
 
Phlog said:
To be honest be was assaulted and defended himself imo. Unless it was a cold revenge sucker punch I'd say he did good.

The knee jerk reaction is to tell the child to find an adult mediator to find a peaceful resolution, but in that moment he's being physically attacked and there ain't no adult. In such a situation it's an appropriate response.

I guess the context is important.
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Right. I think running to tell an adult is kind of a wimp move. How does that teach the other kid anything? It was a knee jerk reaction. Someone grabbed his pants and he turned around and smacked him. It's not like he found him 15 minutes later and sucker punched him.
 
What was the most adjacent playground apparatus when this occurred? We talking sandbox, monkey bars, weird thunderdome thing?
 
An appropriate response imo. Just keep talking to him about when its passable and when it isnt and how it's never what we want to happen but you have the right to defend your body.

I really think modern parents get too freaked out over normal acts of young boys. Of course you dont want to encourage punching but you also dont want them to feel bad about it in an understandable situation.

Mine is 6 too. He is a live one. Its nuanced and you're in the minority. A lot of ball cutting these days imo.
 
That's an understandable reaction....

But I'm not sure that 6 years old is the right age for the "don't take crap from anybody" speech. That's kind of a reactionary, cynical world view you're instilling in him when he should be running around, learning to tie his shoes and how to make friends.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think his reaction was out of the ordinary. And I think you have his best interest in heart with what you've been teaching him. But I think at age six, most boys can't differentiate between "someone giving them crap", or if it's just his buddies or classmates horsing around being boys.

"Don't take crap from anybody" has a time and place in a young man's life, but at this age I worry that he may have that reaction to any time a friend or buddy initiates play by harmless pranks, jokes, goofing around, ball busting, etc.
 
Be proud you aren't raising a soft punk, but let him learn the lesson about the consequences of reacting with violence. It's a 2 for 1 parenting deal IMO. Now you go and have a talk with the principal and let them know there isn't going to be a repeat episode of your son getting pantsed.
 
punky brewster said:
"Don't take crap from anybody" has a time and place in a young man's life, but at this age I worry that he may have that reaction to any time a friend or buddy initiates play by harmless pranks, jokes, goofing around, ball busting, etc.
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Proportionality can come later.

Better to instill action rather than risk a life of inaction. #tcb
 
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