R.I.P. YOLOGOGOPLATA

Just posting to visit you brother @YOLOGOGOPLATA. We're all stuck in our houses but I do think of you regularly.
 
RIP @YOLOGOGOPLATA

This morning I texted him, and earlier this afternoon I received a text from his mother, from his phone, informing me of the tragic news.

Ben was an amazing dude. He was so thoughtful and caring and always had your best interest at heart. He was also a sports encyclopedia - from mma, to basketball and everything in between, he knew stats, dates, accomplishments and could always knock your head off in a debate.

He was actually the only person I've ever made friends with on the internet(which is something I never have done before or even considered doing). I met him on Sherdog (older account) about a year and a half ago and eventually we exchanged numbers and would talk or text. We planned to meet up in person to watch a card at some point as we were about 3 hours away but it never worked out. We talked about sports most of the time but we also talked about life. Ben had a lot of things going for him, he was very athletic (A - Level son) , charismatic, and very intelligent. He was also the kindest dude man, he was so sensible and had a beautiful self awareness to him and always made sure you were comfortable and happy when speaking with you. He also unfortunately had some demons he struggled with for years . Ben struggled with depression and drug use for a while. His mother told me he never learned how to fail and he was so accustomed to being perfect (sports, studies, etc) that once he started to make mistakes and not achieve the goals he strived for, it was a foreign experience for him and that eventually led him to drug use. Last year, when i was going through some things myself, he was one of the first people to call and talk to me like a brother to help even though we didnt even know each other that well. If any of you on here are struggling with any mental health issues or drug abuse please seek help. You can overcome it.

The last time I spoke to him was the day Kobe passed. I remember informing him of Kobe's death and he immediately called me in total shock. This impacted him more then I initially thought and I haven't texted him since then until this morning . What especially hurts to think about is if i should of texted him after Kobe's death instead of waiting an entire week. I had this gut feeling that it affected him a lot and that maybe i should hit him up but i just decided to wait a bit. And right before i woke up earlier I had a dream that I was looking for a missing person. You can't run from destiny. He passed from an overdose on Monday, January 27th 2020.

My condolences go to his family and friends.

This is a link to his obituary if you'd like to read more about him:
https://www.thomasmcafee.com/obituary/Ben-Spark

Please be respectful.
RIP Ben Spark
1990 - 2020
@YOLOGOGOPLATA
Love you bro
RIP BEN!!

Honestly, I’ve struggled with a big Oxy addiction for over 3 years. 2020 I’ve been doing better except for one relapse during lockdown. I had been clean for 5 months before due to my own near death experience. So I didn’t have a detox that would pressure me to use again. Most people don’t understand how horrible addiction to opiates really is. It’s kinda easy to hide it and function as long as you stay high. It turns into a huge secret that you cant admit and no one knows you need help until rock bottom and your tolerance out grows your income. You have to work to use and use so you can work, your body starts depending on it as much as food to survive so you’re trapped in a exhausting life ruining cycle.

When I OD’d It happened 15 minutes after I used and I didn’t wake up in ambulance until they gave me enough narcan 30 minutes later with no idea where I was and why. It literally felt like I was cooking then I blinked and instantly was in ambulance hooked up to IVs completely confused bout everything. It was so scary cause it felt like 2 seconds with no pain at all and if my little boy wasn’t there to get help I would have died and not even realized it. He would have to deal with all the pain while I left and felt nothing, that thought really fucked me up. I stopped cold turkey and since my tolerance was so high the withdrawal lasted a whole month and I didn’t sleep at ALL for 1st 12 days it was mentally and physically the worst thing I ever experienced. I can’t even explain the hell I was in during that.

My heart goes out Ben and all his family and friends. Its one of most tragic things to hear for everyone involved. It’s not people that are bad or worthless that are losing their life it’s mostly really great people like Ben. That’s the most heartbreaking and eye opening thing.

I’m sorry for your loss TS. Sounds like MMA lost a great fan. I appreciate you finding another way for Ben to be remembered through a sport he loved on this platform and also using this to raise awareness through his story. This is first time I’ve told my story to anyone outside of doctor and closest family and friends that helps more than you know. Ben’s story reminded me so much of myself being an athlete most of life and going through same things. People will always judge addicts by there past so I can’t talk about it openly without being judged or losing a job opportunity so the anonymity of Sherdog and your thread remembering Ben inspired me to get it off my chest to people that love MMA as much as me.THANKS TS AND RIP BEN
 
RIP BEN!!

Honestly, I’ve struggled with a big Oxy addiction for over 3 years. 2020 I’ve been doing better except for one relapse during lockdown. I had been clean for 5 months before due to my own near death experience. So I didn’t have a detox that would pressure me to use again. Most people don’t understand how horrible addiction to opiates really is. It’s kinda easy to hide it and function as long as you stay high. It turns into a huge secret that you cant admit and no one knows you need help until rock bottom and your tolerance out grows your income. You have to work to use and use so you can work, your body starts depending on it as much as food to survive so you’re trapped in a exhausting life ruining cycle.

When I OD’d It happened 15 minutes after I used and I didn’t wake up in ambulance until they gave me enough narcan 30 minutes later with no idea where I was and why. It literally felt like I was cooking then I blinked and instantly was in ambulance hooked up to IVs completely confused bout everything. It was so scary cause it felt like 2 seconds with no pain at all and if my little boy wasn’t there to get help I would have died and not even realized it. He would have to deal with all the pain while I left and felt nothing, that thought really fucked me up. I stopped cold turkey and since my tolerance was so high the withdrawal lasted a whole month and I didn’t sleep at ALL for 1st 12 days it was mentally and physically the worst thing I ever experienced. I can’t even explain the hell I was in during that.

My heart goes out Ben and all his family and friends. Its one of most tragic things to hear for everyone involved. It’s not people that are bad or worthless that are losing their life it’s mostly really great people like Ben. That’s the most heartbreaking and eye opening thing.

I’m sorry for your loss TS. Sounds like MMA lost a great fan. I appreciate you finding another way for Ben to be remembered through a sport he loved on this platform and also using this to raise awareness through his story. This is first time I’ve told my story to anyone outside of doctor and closest family and friends that helps more than you know. Ben’s story reminded me so much of myself being an athlete most of life and going through same things. People will always judge addicts by there past so I can’t talk about it openly without being judged or losing a job opportunity so the anonymity of Sherdog and your thread remembering Ben inspired me to get it off my chest to people that love MMA as much as me.THANKS TS AND RIP BEN

Thanks for sharing and stay strong brotha.
 
RIP BEN!!

Honestly, I’ve struggled with a big Oxy addiction for over 3 years. 2020 I’ve been doing better except for one relapse during lockdown. I had been clean for 5 months before due to my own near death experience. So I didn’t have a detox that would pressure me to use again. Most people don’t understand how horrible addiction to opiates really is. It’s kinda easy to hide it and function as long as you stay high. It turns into a huge secret that you cant admit and no one knows you need help until rock bottom and your tolerance out grows your income. You have to work to use and use so you can work, your body starts depending on it as much as food to survive so you’re trapped in a exhausting life ruining cycle.

When I OD’d It happened 15 minutes after I used and I didn’t wake up in ambulance until they gave me enough narcan 30 minutes later with no idea where I was and why. It literally felt like I was cooking then I blinked and instantly was in ambulance hooked up to IVs completely confused bout everything. It was so scary cause it felt like 2 seconds with no pain at all and if my little boy wasn’t there to get help I would have died and not even realized it. He would have to deal with all the pain while I left and felt nothing, that thought really fucked me up. I stopped cold turkey and since my tolerance was so high the withdrawal lasted a whole month and I didn’t sleep at ALL for 1st 12 days it was mentally and physically the worst thing I ever experienced. I can’t even explain the hell I was in during that.

My heart goes out Ben and all his family and friends. Its one of most tragic things to hear for everyone involved. It’s not people that are bad or worthless that are losing their life it’s mostly really great people like Ben. That’s the most heartbreaking and eye opening thing.

I’m sorry for your loss TS. Sounds like MMA lost a great fan. I appreciate you finding another way for Ben to be remembered through a sport he loved on this platform and also using this to raise awareness through his story. This is first time I’ve told my story to anyone outside of doctor and closest family and friends that helps more than you know. Ben’s story reminded me so much of myself being an athlete most of life and going through same things. People will always judge addicts by there past so I can’t talk about it openly without being judged or losing a job opportunity so the anonymity of Sherdog and your thread remembering Ben inspired me to get it off my chest to people that love MMA as much as me.THANKS TS AND RIP BEN
Thank you for the post bro, and for opening up like that. If you ever need someone to talk to, a shoulder to lean on here, message me at anytime and we can chop it up. We're all human and can feel. Love
 
God this sucks. RIP. Didn’t know him but he was a staple around here

y’all fellow sherdoggers stay healthy out there. We may not get along all the time or even often but if you’re struggling, reach out. No one deserves to go out like that, he’s basically my exact age and it’s heartbreaking to think about all the things he’s going to miss. Everyone has demons, you do not need to face them alone.
 
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I like the fact that he's a sticky here. It's like he's still around. Didn't really know him, but It's comforting that he's remembered and respected.
 
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RIP BEN!!

Honestly, I’ve struggled with a big Oxy addiction for over 3 years. 2020 I’ve been doing better except for one relapse during lockdown. I had been clean for 5 months before due to my own near death experience. So I didn’t have a detox that would pressure me to use again. Most people don’t understand how horrible addiction to opiates really is. It’s kinda easy to hide it and function as long as you stay high. It turns into a huge secret that you cant admit and no one knows you need help until rock bottom and your tolerance out grows your income. You have to work to use and use so you can work, your body starts depending on it as much as food to survive so you’re trapped in a exhausting life ruining cycle.

When I OD’d It happened 15 minutes after I used and I didn’t wake up in ambulance until they gave me enough narcan 30 minutes later with no idea where I was and why. It literally felt like I was cooking then I blinked and instantly was in ambulance hooked up to IVs completely confused bout everything. It was so scary cause it felt like 2 seconds with no pain at all and if my little boy wasn’t there to get help I would have died and not even realized it. He would have to deal with all the pain while I left and felt nothing, that thought really fucked me up. I stopped cold turkey and since my tolerance was so high the withdrawal lasted a whole month and I didn’t sleep at ALL for 1st 12 days it was mentally and physically the worst thing I ever experienced. I can’t even explain the hell I was in during that.

My heart goes out Ben and all his family and friends. Its one of most tragic things to hear for everyone involved. It’s not people that are bad or worthless that are losing their life it’s mostly really great people like Ben. That’s the most heartbreaking and eye opening thing.

I’m sorry for your loss TS. Sounds like MMA lost a great fan. I appreciate you finding another way for Ben to be remembered through a sport he loved on this platform and also using this to raise awareness through his story. This is first time I’ve told my story to anyone outside of doctor and closest family and friends that helps more than you know. Ben’s story reminded me so much of myself being an athlete most of life and going through same things. People will always judge addicts by there past so I can’t talk about it openly without being judged or losing a job opportunity so the anonymity of Sherdog and your thread remembering Ben inspired me to get it off my chest to people that love MMA as much as me.THANKS TS AND RIP BEN
Amen, brother. Around 2010 I injured my back very badly. I was a young athletic guy and it still shocks me to this day the shit that doctors were handing out at that time. I went to see an acupuncture specialist, who also ran a pain clinic. He put me on Opana Ir, which is Oxymorphone. They say it’s basically synthetic morphine. The thing is it does not give much of a euphoria when taken orally, so I didn’t think it was addictive. He also told me it would not be addictive.

My tolerance skyrocketed and at that point I couldn’t even feel a few norco or Percocet. I started researching oxymorphone, something I should have done before taking it, I know. It turned out it had been removed from shelves in the 80’s because it was so dangerous. Like you said, you start to need them to function. Something as simple as cleaning your house requires you to take them, or you don’t have the energy to do it. What a vicious cycle.

I quit taking them at that point. Like you I went through a living hell for at least a month. The first two weeks were hell on earth. Something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. I couldn’t sleep or eat. I recall time going by so slow.

I’ve been lucky to never go back to it, but I do still have nightmares about getting hooked again.

Thanks for sharing man. You’re not alone.
 
Amen, brother. Around 2010 I injured my back very badly. I was a young athletic guy and it still shocks me to this day the shit that doctors were handing out at that time. I went to see an acupuncture specialist, who also ran a pain clinic. He put me on Opana Ir, which is Oxymorphone. They say it’s basically synthetic morphine. The thing is it does not give much of a euphoria when taken orally, so I didn’t think it was addictive. He also told me it would not be addictive.

My tolerance skyrocketed and at that point I couldn’t even feel a few norco or Percocet. I started researching oxymorphone, something I should have done before taking it, I know. It turned out it had been removed from shelves in the 80’s because it was so dangerous. Like you said, you start to need them to function. Something as simple as cleaning your house requires you to take them, or you don’t have the energy to do it. What a vicious cycle.

I quit taking them at that point. Like you I went through a living hell for at least a month. The first two weeks were hell on earth. Something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. I couldn’t sleep or eat. I recall time going by so slow.

I’ve been lucky to never go back to it, but I do still have nightmares about getting hooked again.

Thanks for sharing man. You’re not alone.
I had back surgery 3 years ago, artificial disc replacement. At L5 S1.I still take 1 pill of 10mg of norco a day. Just to take the edge off. But my pain isnt managed. I just deal it. Pre back surgery i used to take 5 pills of 10mg norcos a day. Im having complications and pain in the area some 2 years after surgery. Been out of work for a while. I take benzos too. But usually no more than .5 to 1mg a day. Ive cut back my use a lot. I try to do other meditating techniques. I remember someone gave me a small little bag of fentanyl. But mixed fent not pure fent. I just ate a bit of the powder. Fuck dude, i was on jupiter. Thats hands down the best pain killer. Im trying to get my pain management doctor to get me the fentanyl skin patch. You wear it for 3 days and it slowly puts the medicine in your body. But they only give that to like major car accident victims or cancer patients... my L5 S1 is the last disc, its the load bearing disc. Still gives me tremendous pain. Shit i couldnt sleep last night because of it. Its 740am now and i hope to get some Zzzz soon. Hang in there.
 
Aw man this is tragic

RIP

Nice guy he will be missed :(
This is how i feel as well. Rest in peace Yolo. You'll be missed but not forgotten bruddah
 
I like the fact that he's a sticky here. It's like he's still around. Didn't really know him, but It's comforting that he's remembered and respected.

Absolutely brah. I miss him.
 
RIP BEN!!

Honestly, I’ve struggled with a big Oxy addiction for over 3 years. 2020 I’ve been doing better except for one relapse during lockdown. I had been clean for 5 months before due to my own near death experience. So I didn’t have a detox that would pressure me to use again. Most people don’t understand how horrible addiction to opiates really is. It’s kinda easy to hide it and function as long as you stay high. It turns into a huge secret that you cant admit and no one knows you need help until rock bottom and your tolerance out grows your income. You have to work to use and use so you can work, your body starts depending on it as much as food to survive so you’re trapped in a exhausting life ruining cycle.

When I OD’d It happened 15 minutes after I used and I didn’t wake up in ambulance until they gave me enough narcan 30 minutes later with no idea where I was and why. It literally felt like I was cooking then I blinked and instantly was in ambulance hooked up to IVs completely confused bout everything. It was so scary cause it felt like 2 seconds with no pain at all and if my little boy wasn’t there to get help I would have died and not even realized it. He would have to deal with all the pain while I left and felt nothing, that thought really fucked me up. I stopped cold turkey and since my tolerance was so high the withdrawal lasted a whole month and I didn’t sleep at ALL for 1st 12 days it was mentally and physically the worst thing I ever experienced. I can’t even explain the hell I was in during that.

My heart goes out Ben and all his family and friends. Its one of most tragic things to hear for everyone involved. It’s not people that are bad or worthless that are losing their life it’s mostly really great people like Ben. That’s the most heartbreaking and eye opening thing.

I’m sorry for your loss TS. Sounds like MMA lost a great fan. I appreciate you finding another way for Ben to be remembered through a sport he loved on this platform and also using this to raise awareness through his story. This is first time I’ve told my story to anyone outside of doctor and closest family and friends that helps more than you know. Ben’s story reminded me so much of myself being an athlete most of life and going through same things. People will always judge addicts by there past so I can’t talk about it openly without being judged or losing a job opportunity so the anonymity of Sherdog and your thread remembering Ben inspired me to get it off my chest to people that love MMA as much as me.THANKS TS AND RIP BEN
Just a great dude I wish he could witness this crazy event with us Sherbros. Yeah me and him would have some fun making picks and getting fucked up. He use to always give me shit for being cheap and not buying the ppv but I am today!
 
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