Social Kid Got Attacked At Recess

[Canadian Kicker]

That's a pretty terrible method of deduction.

Basing the seriousness on their age seems pretty appropriate to me.
A 6 year old boy doing this to a 6 year old girl is much different than if they were 16.

The fact that this is the line you draw for judging whether something is serious leads me to believe you're either lying or absolutely terrible at what you do. If they exist then my condolences to the kids who have to be around you.

Whether there was actual physical harm or not? Yes, this is a very important line. Thankfully TS has confirmed there was not.

I never said either of those things

You didn't say it but just saying that "this is unacceptable" solves nothing. Unacceptable or not this behavior happens on a regular bases.
"Unacceptable" things happen and we have to learn how to deal with them

I'm going to be completely honest. Stop "working with kids" immediately.

To this I am just going to say, you have never met me, spoke to me, nor seen any of my kids and how they developed.
However, if you are looking to have you kids coddled and told how special they are then no don't send them to me.

 

[CrazyN8]

Go enroll your daughter in BJJ right now. And no this isn't a joke post.

 

[Sweater of AV]

Basing the seriousness on their age seems pretty appropriate to me.
A 6 year old boy doing this to a 6 year old girl is much different than if they were 16.

There are far more variables than just their age. That's obvious to anyone who is in an actual supervisory role of children. If you walk by a six year old choking another six year old and think "that seems normal, I'm going to let kids be kids" then you have an obvious issue.

Whether there was actual physical harm or not? Yes, this is a very important line. Thankfully TS has confirmed there was not.

Indeed, physical harm is important. That's not what TS confirmed. Reading comprehension is also important.

You didn't say it but just saying that "this is unacceptable" solves nothing. Unacceptable or not this behavior happens on a regular bases.
"Unacceptable" things happen and we have to learn how to deal with them

I never said what I would do. I was merely pointing out that your strategy of "let kids be kids because they're six years old" is idiotic.

To this I am just going to say, you have never met me, spoke to me, nor seen any of my kids and how they developed.
However, if you are looking to have you kids coddled and told how special they are then no don't send them to me.

I haven't met you and your level of intelligence is a pretty strong indication that it wouldn't be worthwhile. None of my kids were coddled. Thankfully they were also taught that choking other kids for no reason was unacceptable. You see, if you had any semblance of intelligence you would realize that it is possible to be tough while understanding bullying and choking are uncacceptable. Somehow, my kids at 6 years old were more intelligent than you.

What's overwhelmingly clear here is that you're using a thread about a six year old being bullied and choked to try and make yourself seem tough Again, you really shouldn't be working with children.

 

[ColemanwastheGOAT]

Not really. My dad always taught me not to start shit but if someone hits you your absolutely in the right to defend yourself. Shoulda laid them hands on that girl, that stops bullying 9 times out of 10.

When I was six, if a boy was beating up a girl in my class he would have gotten obliterated by the other boys in class. If my grandson had been there he would have lumped this kid up. He got in trouble for beating up a bully last year and I made sure he understood he had done the right thing and sometimes teachers are wrong.

 

[method115]

I understand how you feel but I side with your wife on this one. Doesn't seem like it was a huge deal but I do think it's a good idea to get your daughter involved in some training. BJJ. Maybe even show her some stuff at home. I learned how to fight a lot just from me and my cousin play fighting all day long.
I think you train BJJ actually don't you? Maybe just do some training at home. I plan to do that with my kids and have kind of started with my son already.

 

[RoastBeast]

I say you drive to the school and beat the hell out of that 6 year old kid.

 

[THE Red Beard]

Tough call here @deadshot138 as I know what your training and mentality is telling you to do. Here, as much as we don't like it, this was a character-building event for your daughter. It is an opportunity for you as her Dad to offer her some knowledge that could forever change her mindset moving forward. Sure, she should defend herself, but the truth is, much of this behavior exhibited by the boy that tackled her is modeled. Maybe by an older brother/sister or his parents. Your job is to explain to her that in a civilized society, we don't resort to violence unless we have no choice. We use words first to hopefully come to an understanding and then if we have no choice, we operate with the least amount of force to stop the threat. I do not have kids, but have had this talk with my nephew a few times. I trained him in boxing and he knows we only use that stuff if he has no other choice.

 

[shunyata]

6, first grade. It was a tackle and choking.

Get her into jiu jitsu classes.

But if there are broader systemic issues in the district AND you have the means, I'd start looking at other school districts in the area and what moving would look like.

 

[Oblivian]

Does your daughter do any sports? I don't think you need to get your daughter in wrestling or BJJ if she's not interested. Other sports like basketball, softball, gymnastics, etc. will give her the confidence, aggression, etc. to handle herself fine at this age. The kids are 6...

 

[Cyrano200]

I think all of us who have kids have been in some variation of this situation. And probably all of us who were kids have been too.
When our son (and daughter at another time) was getting picked on at school, my wife was adamant "never hit back, get a teacher" because she didn't want our boy to "get in trouble". It was a serious point of contention because I insisted that while avoidance was first choice, never tolerate another kid laying hands on you. If you are attacked, strike back and don't stop until you are sure you are safe.
Proud father moments:
My oldest daughter got sent home once when she pushed a boy down and was starting to kick him when he hit her friend.
My youngest daughter got suspended from pre-school for biting a boy after he had hit and bit her. I'm still salty because he had done it to another child previously and he was allowed back before my daughter was.
My son beat up his bully, but I'm not quite as proud of that because it was a prearranged fight instead of self-defense, and he had friend record it.
The theme of all of this is that schools are instilling an attitude of acceptance in non-violent kids and encouraging the violent ones with weak consequences or none at all.

 

[Busgosu]

I'm from a different culture and sometimes get lost with some terminology. Does "Sped" mean the kid is a retard?

 

[William Munny]

That sucks TS. your feelings are perfectly natural. any loving father defends/protects their children.

 

[Protectandserve]

My ex has my son in a private school. It’s a completely different set of problems. Spoiled little shits who have maids and nannies and the like who can’t do anything on their own.

Everyone is wearing designer bullshit, the elementary kids have Apple Watches and iPhones and it’s all about looking good for the Gram. The pick up line is all Mercedes Benz, Range Rovers, Teslas etc and the kids all hang out the windows, climb on the roofs, etc.

I live in a good school district with normal working class people and the schools by me reflect that, they are solid and the parents are normal human beings with normal kids.

 

[Patrick Jane]

 

[Eric O]

And I'm resisting the urge of going to the school, punting the offending kid into orbit and manhandling the parents. Public schools, brahs. Not even once. Tried telling the wife we should move to a better school district or look into private school. She thinks being educated around feral kids with shit parents is "character building." Giving the school a chance to rectify the situation before I end up on the evening news. I can just see some idiot TA on their phone while my kid is being attacked. Makes my blood boil. And of course my kid won't defend herself because she thinks she'll get in trouble.

Force her into bjj. Both my kids train, they're 6 and 8. My daughter is a savage. I don't worry about them at all. My son also wrestles and I hold mits and box with them.

We have to prepare our kids for life.

 

[deadshot138]

I say you drive to the school and beat the hell out of that 6 year old kid.

As unreasonable as that is, when I first heard about what happened, it's what I wanted to do. Papa Bear instincts.

 

[SakurabasEar]

Whatever you do don't stab the principle I tried that before and the whole situation backfired on me

 

[deadshot138]

I'm from a different culture and sometimes get lost with some terminology. Does "Sped" mean the kid is a retard?

Sped is a derogatory term for special education. immature of me to say it but at time of writing I was still pretty pissed off. I understand these things happen and in the grand scheme she didn't have a scratch on her after, but I'd definitely prefer it not to happen.

 

[Canadian Kicker]

There are far more variables than just their age. That's obvious to anyone who is in an actual supervisory role of children. If you walk by a six year old choking another six year old and think "that seems normal, I'm going to let kids be kids" then you have an obvious issue.

Its seems you have some reading comprehension problems. Of course you are going to stop it, the post was talking about advice for the parent not the supervisor. I thought that seemed very obvious. It is the aftermath that we are talking about and realizing that a supervisor is not always going to be able to stop things.

Indeed, physical harm is important. That's not what TS confirmed. Reading comprehension is also important.

No marks and she didn't even cry when it happened. However, being tough doesn't mean it's open season to physically assault you.

Sounds confirmed to me but maybe I just can't read.

I never said what I would do. I was merely pointing out that your strategy of "let kids be kids because they're six years old" is idiotic.

Agree to disagree with this one. I would say that teaching a kid that nobody is going to bully you is more idiotic.

I haven't met you and your level of intelligence is a pretty strong indication that it wouldn't be worthwhile. None of my kids were coddled. Thankfully they were also taught that choking other kids for no reason was unacceptable. You see, if you had any semblance of intelligence you would realize that it is possible to be tough while understanding bullying and choking are uncacceptable. Somehow, my kids at 6 years old were more intelligent than you.

Again your reading comprehension and your assumptions are sending you way off course. This child didn't choke anybody.

The advice I would give to the bully's parents would be very different, they are different situations. You see, unacceptable things happen everyday.
No school or policy is going to magically stop this. As intelligent as you think you are, you can't understand this?

What's overwhelmingly clear here is that you're using a thread about a six year old being bullied and choked to try and make yourself seem tough Again, you really shouldn't be working with children.

Not sure how I am making myself seem tough. I am using a thread about a six year old being bullied and choked to try and offer some realistic advice to a parent dealing with this. I then had someone go off on a weird rebuttal because they make too many assumptions with very little information and because they cannot understand viewpoints that are not their own.


Bottom line this is still a thread written by a parent about their child being bullied so I'll stop it here.
If you would like to continue a debate on child development, feel free to PM me any time.

 

[Busgosu]

Sped is a derogatory term for special education. immature of me to say it but at time of writing I was still pretty pissed off. I understand these things happen and in the grand scheme she didn't have a scratch on her after, but I'd definitely prefer it not to happen.

I have a daughter too, just tell her to punch him in the face or kick him in the balls next time, lol no need for bjj to put the kid in a flying gogoplata. Never turn the other cheek or tell the teachers cause they will do jack. It sucks but learning how to deal with assholes from a young age will help her.
OFC this is because it's a minor case that kids can take care of themselves.