Who did you side with during the Helen of Troy debacle?

Hector was put in a situation. But obviously, its a story of a hero who beats the mighty kingdom.
 
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Everybody is saying the Trojans, but technically the Acheans
Trojan side was one that fucked up

Regardless the version (her being kidnapped or her willing leaving with Paris) it was a move that would have caused the war, sure Acheans where the overall assholes in the conflict but still this was the trigger spark, and even after that the reparation Menelaus vs Paris duel that could have fixed it with Paris loss, has been fucked up (in Iliad by Aphrodite+Paris in movie by Paris himself iirc)

Paris twice caused Troy's doom, and ultimately trojans sided with him

Btw Hector and Aeneas were two best human beings, and both were trojans


A rare role for Sean Bean. A movie with war in it where he survives.

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Had super important/charismatic character too, but movie did nothing with it lol
 
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I personally feel like both Homer and Herodotus were full of shit.

Here's a map of Greece

1000_F_82230089_uquDJX7ByCMykBon0T3MMvYFw9nftvXd.jpg


We are supposed to believe that the Persians could only access Sparta through a choke point that 300 soldiers could use to their advantage? There was NO OTHER way in?

It's called the hot gates for a reason...... Them Persians didn't dare to invade any other way, they'd been bummed to death by swarms of 16 year old Greek boys roaming the wilderness.....
 
I'm ready for Spike Lee's remake.

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Shaneequa of Troy. Lol



Man I vaguely know the story but can't remember who is who.

If the bitch was kidnapped and raped then yeah, go to war.

If she just ran off with him then that is some very weak egotistical shit ti drag people to war over.

Did we ever find out which it was?
 
Its such a convoluted story that by the end you're just glad it's over. Guess I side with Achilles and somewhat with Melenus in the books. Honestly lay the blame on Hector and Paris and a lot of the gods
 
I personally feel like both Homer and Herodotus were full of shit.

Here's a map of Greece

1000_F_82230089_uquDJX7ByCMykBon0T3MMvYFw9nftvXd.jpg


We are supposed to believe that the Persians could only access Sparta through a choke point that 300 soldiers could use to their advantage? There was NO OTHER way in?
I think that battle was not really significant.
 
The Theatrical Edition was released in the year 2004. I thought that it was okay.

In my opinion, the movie that released in 2004 became better with the Director's Cut. Even then, it's not the greatest movie of all time.

In the 2004 movie, Brendan Gleeson portrayed King Menelaos (also known as King Menelaus). The movie characterized Menelaos as being a superpowerful assassin. He was a great soldier (even at his advanced age). In some ways, Brendan Gleeson's portrayal of Menelaos reminds me of Roy Nelson (in his best condition) and Kelvin Gastelum (in his best condition).

Unfortunately, the movie also portrayed him as an old fart that had a beer gut. This greasy, fat mofo was purposefully designed to make the average moviegoer despise him. Who could possibly be in the military of a dinosaur that has a beer gut?

Even if he could collect a considerable number of superfans, it would be difficult for folks to agree with this greasy, fat motherfucker to be anywhere near Helen (a sexy chick).

It was obvious that the director (and everyone around him) wanted a gargantuan amount of moviegoers to take it easy on King Priam, Prince Hector, Prince Paris, and the rest of the nation known as Troy.

The movie went as far as to say that 99% or 100% of the Trojan Military allowed their opponents and enemies to give their murdered soldiers and assassins proper burials. Would anyone in the Greek Military have done the same for them?

As far as which relationship was the correct relationship and which was the wrong relationship, would it be correct for me to assume that Helen could've politely skipped every marriage?

Did Menelaos ever force himself upon Helen? Did Menelaos force Helen to marry him? If the relationship was such a mis-match, why did Helen ever marry him in the first place?

If it's true that Helen and Prince Paris were deeply in love with each other, then he should've asked her why she married Menelaos in the first place.

If I were him, I would've made myself 100% certain.

If it's true that Prince Paris straight-up raped Helen, then that means that Prince Paris is a federal criminal and a rapist. Case Closed.

End of story.

The entire Greek Military became livid and enraged that Helen was raped. Menelaos became livid and enraged that Helen was raped.

King Menelaos begged King Agamemnon for their forces to work together in order to erase Troy from the damn map. It seems like Agamemnon was always keeping his eye on Troy anyway.

Eventually, Agamemnon was going to nuclear bomb Troy because those acts of nuclear war were always in his plans. These events and these relationships gave him the perfect excuse to do what he was always planning on anyway.
 
The Theatrical Edition was released in the year 2004. I thought that it was okay.

In my opinion, the movie that released in 2004 became better with the Director's Cut. Even then, it's not the greatest movie of all time.

In the 2004 movie, Brendan Gleeson portrayed King Menelaos (also known as King Menelaus). The movie characterized Menelaos as being a superpowerful assassin. He was a great soldier (even at his advanced age). In some ways, Brendan Gleeson's portrayal of Menelaos reminds me of Roy Nelson (in his best condition) and Kelvin Gastelum (in his best condition).

Unfortunately, the movie also portrayed him as an old fart that had a beer gut. This greasy, fat mofo was purposefully designed to make the average moviegoer despise him. Who could possibly be in the military of a dinosaur that has a beer gut?

Even if he could collect a considerable number of superfans, it would be difficult for folks to agree with this greasy, fat motherfucker to be anywhere near Helen (a sexy chick).

It was obvious that the director (and everyone around him) wanted a gargantuan amount of moviegoers to take it easy on King Priam, Prince Hector, Prince Paris, and the rest of the nation known as Troy.

The movie went as far as to say that 99% or 100% of the Trojan Military allowed their opponents and enemies to give their murdered soldiers and assassins proper burials. Would anyone in the Greek Military have done the same for them?

As far as which relationship was the correct relationship and which was the wrong relationship, would it be correct for me to assume that Helen could've politely skipped every marriage?

Did Menelaos ever force himself upon Helen? Did Menelaos force Helen to marry him? If the relationship was such a mis-match, why did Helen ever marry him in the first place?

If it's true that Helen and Prince Paris were deeply in love with each other, then he should've asked her why she married Menelaos in the first place.

If I were him, I would've made myself 100% certain.

If it's true that Prince Paris straight-up raped Helen, then that means that Prince Paris is a federal criminal and a rapist. Case Closed.

End of story.

The entire Greek Military became livid and enraged that Helen was raped. Menelaos became livid and enraged that Helen was raped.

King Menelaos begged King Agamemnon for their forces to work together in order to erase Troy from the damn map. It seems like Agamemnon was always keeping his eye on Troy anyway.

Eventually, Agamemnon was going to nuclear bomb Troy because those acts of nuclear war were always in his plans. These events and these relationships gave him the perfect excuse to do what he was always planning on anyway.
Interesting take. I wasn't aware nuclear weapons existed in 12th century BCE
 
Interesting take. I wasn't aware nuclear weapons existed in 12th century BCE



You are now. You're welcome.

Yes, it's obvious that you're being sarcastic. Needless to say, I realize that you're being facetious.

Supergods and superbeings with superpowers were in the same room with a huge amount of these characters. These Olympian Supergods were living, breathing nuclear bombs.

Unless I'm mistaken, Achilles actually met Athena. I mean, he was in the same room with Athena, The Goddess of War.

Besides being The Goddess of Warfare, Athena was also The Goddess of Wisdom, The Goddess of Strategy, and The Goddess of Handicraft. I wouldn't be surprised if she was the goddess of a dozen other ideas and a dozen other things.
 
You are now. You're welcome.

Yes, it's obvious that you're being sarcastic. Needless to say, I realize that you're being facetious.

Supergods and superbeings with superpowers were in the same room with a huge amount of these characters. These Olympian Supergods were living, breathing nuclear bombs.

Unless I'm mistaken, Achilles actually met Athena. I mean, he was in the same room with Athena, The Goddess of War.

Besides being The Goddess of Warfare, Athena was also The Goddess of Wisdom, The Goddess of Strategy, and The Goddess of Handicraft. I wouldn't be surprised if she was the goddess of a dozen other ideas and a dozen other things.
Criticizes me for poking fun at the literal mention of nuclear bombs in the post I quoted detailing a war that took place before BCE

Goes on to detail how God's were involved in the war.

This thread has gone places where no man has gone before...
 
Shaneequa of Troy. Lol



Man I vaguely know the story but can't remember who is who.

If the bitch was kidnapped and raped then yeah, go to war.

If she just ran off with him then that is some very weak egotistical shit ti drag people to war over.

Did we ever find out which it was?

The ambiguity of the ordeal is a common motif in mythology and literature.

For example, The Old Testament has “The Rape of Dina”, where Dina visits a city and while there meets a Prince, then depending on the translation she is either raped or simply seduced by the Prince. Her brothers response is similarly extreme.

A woman running away with another man, from the perspective of the woman’s family/other perspective suitors, will often be viewed as non-consensual. It is not hard to imagine a young woman falling for a handsome and powerful Prince though.
 
I personally feel like both Homer and Herodotus were full of shit.

Here's a map of Greece

1000_F_82230089_uquDJX7ByCMykBon0T3MMvYFw9nftvXd.jpg


We are supposed to believe that the Persians could only access Sparta through a choke point that 300 soldiers could use to their advantage? There was NO OTHER way in?
without doing research they probably didn't want to splinter their army on island invasions and opted on a stealth land incursion on mainland Greece from an unexpected angle. The Greeks were the literal ocean masters, if you conquered Rhodes you'd have one hell of a waiting army and long warfare.
 
Interesting take. I wasn't aware nuclear weapons existed in 12th century BCE

They did but it was a rare radioactive isotope that they used up, they literally bummed themselves back to the stone age, lucky that haven't tried to create it again or maybe it's the cause of our current gender ideology issues, of an ancient Greek weapon of mass destruction and the delayed fall out .........
 
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