Social Do you lie or do you tell the truth?

[Fugazy]

This is such a black and white thread. Lol.

oh you…

 

[preppypyro]

I'm definitely a non bullshit truth teller kind of guy.

But I think I'd have to answer this with, it depends on the situation of things.

Ive noticed as I get older, the whole "tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth" can sometimes lead to more issues than a white lie.

I try to live my life by just being a person that's not full of shit. Not perfect by any means but I find if you're just not full of shit, things go pretty smooth,!

 

[StonedLemur]

You are not lying bro.

Im the type of dude who might pull a bitch anywhere. And a lot of guys don’t like that. I’m not rich, but I’m doing OK, and I can only really mess with a few friends I’ve had since my teens because of that.

I would literally never pull someone else’s chick, but when I meet new dudes, friends of friends type situation, they tend to get salty because bitches I don’t know tend to like me.

Im sorry women like how I look and I walk like I know how to fold up a woman. I don’t know anything else.

Edit:! And I’m almost never even thinking of women when I go out. It’s just not like that for me. I don’t even want to bother and other things are taking up space in my mind.

Not only that but when you think about women when you go out you tend to repel them because they feel that on you.

 

[Starman]

Do you tell the truth or do you lie?

I tell the truth about everything to a fault.

My parents raised me Christian with good morals (I'm an agnostic now), I try to help people and I always tell them the truth no matter if it hurts their feelings or not. Obviously, I don't take this out of proportion and hurt people but while some people will conceal information to glean benefits from others, I'll tell them the truth in order to help the other person get ahead which usually leads to no direct benefit to me and makes people angry at me for telling them how they can get ahead. Other people would lie or conceal information to these individuals in order to make them feel good/not make them feel bad. When people lie, it angers me, I then point the truth out and then I want to get away.

Do I tell the truth because I've been manipulated to tell the truth by my parents and now it's second nature? Or did my parents want me to have a solid foundation knowing that lies will lead you to trouble in the future? Or is it for personal benefit? Is it because I tell them the truth in order for them to get ahead so that my friendship with them will be more fruitful for both of us? Is this a way for me to feel superiority over others? Am I so far up my own ass because I'm smart/think too much that I find it hard to connect with others? Is it because I come from a collectivist culture and therefore I'm looking to help others before I help myself? All of the above? Is this a healthy outlook or should I be lying more in order to benefit from others? Does lying lead to short term benefit but long term misery?

When people criticize me I take it pretty well and I always question myself and my actions. I'm honest with myself because I feel like you need to be honest with yourself in order to be as successful as possible.

I'm asking these questions because for the most part I'm a lone wolf with hardly any friends because of these traits while I see other people who are more dishonest and manipulative with tons of friends and opportunities. I basically get 0 opportunities because no one wants to benefit someone they don't like. I have a few friends that I can be upfront and honest with and we're cool but in general you could call me a loner who spends his friday and saturdays alone working on my programming to get ahead or watching MMA and chatting on Sherdog. I'm above average in attractiveness, 5'11, above average IQ, athletic but I still feel like I'm different than others and can't connect with the general population.

This might be a question better suited for a psychologist (psychiatrist? lol) but I feel like it would be hard to get answers to these questions because I doubt most people scrutinize themselves or others to this level to begin with. I'd have to search pretty far and wide to get the right type of psychologist that could help me answer the above questions. This is why I turn to Sherdog armchair psychologists. Please let me know what you think, it's highly appreciated. Any and all comments are welcome. Especially for the older folk who have more experience in life.


TLDR:

Do you lie to others? Or tell them the truth? Do you lie to yourself or are you honest with yourself? Why do you do what you do?

When it comes to honesty, there’s a difference between being frank/blunt and being tactful.

Your problem may not necessarily be that you’re too honest, but rather your delivery is poor.

There’s a way to be honest that doesn’t cost you friendships / relationships in the process.

Your age might have something to do with it too. Millennials and their bastard zoomer offspring tend to have very weak or non-existent social skills.

 

[Pliny Pete]

Im pretty truthful but Im also a pretty good storyteller so I understand how to massage the truth and make it sound better, theres no lies in my stories, just fancy truth

 

[Fugazy]

Not only that but when you think about women when you go out you tend to repel them because they feel that on you.

And 100% too I will go out of my way to not flirt with anyones woman or any woman because you never know. I’m polite but that’s it. Even in a new situation if a woman is a little too friendly I tend to fold up and talk to the guys. I don’t trust that.

…I don’t play that shit, you never know who you might be around, and I’m really not that kind of guy. But women usually like me wherever I go.

Dudes notice that and it tends to make them salty.

 

[StonedLemur]

And 100% too I will go out of my way to not flirt with anyones woman or any woman because you never know. I’m polite but that’s it. Even in a new situation if a woman is a little too friendly I tend to fold up and talk to the guys. I don’t trust that.

…I don’t play that shit, you never know who you might be around, and I’m really not that kind of guy. But women usually like me wherever I go.

Dudes notice that and it tends to make them salty.

They like you because you don't pay attention to their every move and that intrigues them.
The guys get salty because they are they insecure douches women hate lol.

 

[Fugazy]

They like you because you don't pay attention to their every move and that intrigues them.
The guys get salty because they are they insecure douches women hate lol.

I guess so. I’m not the shit, biggest,strongest…whatever, kind of dude, but I’ve got a few things going for me. I know most people think I’m handsome, but that comes with being a clean looking good smelling Latino, usually.

But yeah, even at my advanced age where I shouldn’t have to worry about these things. There are guys around me, work usually, (I don’t go out much), who tend to get salty that women like talking to me.

I got a wife who is taller than me and can throw hands. I’ve seen it. If I were even interested in these hoes she would be putting them into the shadow realm left and right. I don’t need that lmao. She doesn’t either.

One thing I do like though is it sorts out who is cool or a solid dude and who is a soft ass hating bitch pretty quick.

 

[AldoStillGoat]

Do people not feel ridiculous when they post shit like that? Zero self awareness <45>

you mean like your username ?



To answer your question, no I don’t feel ridiculous because we’re posting in an anonymous capacity. I’m self aware to know not to talk to about this type of thing out in the open in front of large groups I don’t trust. Especially ones who have the capacity to hate because they are less fortunate.

 

[AldoStillGoat]

TS and I have a history. But he s being reasonable today.

I’m reasonable if I’m being serious. Some people have a problem separating trolling from being serious. It’s a karate forum where people troll most of the time and don’t act how they would otherwise.

also, we don’t have a history, I don’t know you nor care to remember any past interaction with you…. I don’t cling onto things like that. Life is short. But you do what you have to do brother.

 

[StonedLemur]

I guess so. I’m not the shit, biggest,strongest…whatever, kind of dude, but I’ve got a few things going for me. I know most people think I’m handsome, but that comes with being a clean looking good smelling Latino, usually.

But yeah, even at my advanced age where I shouldn’t have to worry about these things. There are guys around me, work usually, (I don’t go out much), who tend to get salty that women like talking to me.

I got a wife who is taller than me and can throw hands. I’ve seen it. If I were even interested in these hoes she would be putting them into the shadow realm left and right. I don’t need that lmao. She doesn’t either.

One thing I do like though is it sorts out who is cool or a solid dude and who is a soft ass hating bitch pretty quick.

My friend said to me last year...

he said "I go to the gym, I shave everyday, I wear new clothes and that bitch wouldn't stop talking to you....here you are with cutoff jogging pants with paint all over them, a 10 year old Celtics hoodie, also with paint all over it...and you haven't worked out 15 years.....what do you got that I don't have?"
I said I have the confidence not to give a fuck whether she talked to me or not.

He just looked at me with the same look a dog gives you when they don't understand the command...head all sideways like huh? Lol.

 

[AldoStillGoat]

Maybe you're just confusing the phrase, "tell the truth," with "find ways to criticize."

I come from a position of caring about them and wanting them to see good. Usually, it’s me thinking I know what can assist the person in the situation so I open my mouth and give advice even when it’s not asked for. I see a problem? I offer a solution.

 

[StonedLemur]

I’m reasonable if I’m being serious. Some people have a problem separating trolling from being serious. It’s a karate forum where people troll most of the time and don’t act how they would otherwise.

also, we don’t have a history, I don’t know you nor care to remember any past interaction with you…. I don’t cling onto things like that. Life is short. But you do what you have to do brother.

I think that's why some people don't like me sir, because im who I actually am on a daily basis.

 

[AldoStillGoat]

This is such a black and white thread. Lol.

Yeah, I have a problem with that in general. Be more specific if you can. You usually have some good insight when I see you post.

 

[AldoStillGoat]

People who claim to always tell the truth usually mean they say what they believe to be true and it is often not the actual truth. TS claims to be good looking and intelligent but what standards are being used to make these declarations. Are the comparisons to average looks and intelligence?

I try to educate myself to find the truth where many people choose to live in ignorance to preserve their version of what they believe to be true. Very often what people believe to be true has no bearing on what is true. It is difficult for people to interact with others who have different beliefs and therefore have different truths.

suppose it is the truth

forget the personal attributes and answer the questions from a frame point of there not being anything wrong with me socially

I can see why other posters think I’m being a douche by what I posted <45> I probably am one and need to work on my empathy and soft skills a bit

 

[StonedLemur]

This is such a black and white thread. Lol.

So it's shades of gray sir?

 

[Fugazy]

My friend said to me last year...

he said "I go to the gym, I shave everyday, I wear new clothes and that bitch wouldn't stop talking to you....here you are with cutoff jogging pants with paint all over them, a 10 year old Celtics hoodie, also with paint all over it...and you haven't worked out 15 years.....what do you got that I don't have?"
I said I have the confidence not to give a fuck whether she talked to me or not.

He just looked at me with the same look a dog gives you when they don't understand the command...head all sideways like huh? Lol.

Heheheh yeah that’s it.

Im not flashy in any way. I’m just well put together in some ways. But When I’m at my most comfortable I’m in a 6 year old Bucks hoodie and a 5 dollar bass pro trucker hat vs when someone is all fancied up for some reason it’s like they just know. Hell I can dress up too, I just don’t like it.

I do have a pretty face though lmao. Which helps Im sure.

But yeah, they can smell a man from a mile away. Not too many of us left.

 

[StonedLemur]

suppose it is the truth and that

forget the personal attributes and answer the questions from a frame point of there not being anything wrong with me socially

I can see why other posters think I’m being a douche by what I posted <45> I probably am one and need to work on my empathy and soft skills a bit

"Soft skills"... nothing assholeish about that sir lmao.

 

[StonedLemur]

Heheheh yeah that’s it.

Im not flashy in any way. I’m just well put together in some ways. But When I’m at my most comfortable I’m in a 6 year old Bucks hoodie and a 5 dollar bass pro trucker hat vs when someone is all fancied up for some reason it’s like they just know. Hell I can dress up too, I just don’t like it.

I do have a pretty face though lmao. Which helps Im sure.

But yeah, they can smell a man from a mile away. Not too many of us left.

You're a slut and I love you for it whore lmao

 

[Alphaboy]

Yeah, I have a problem with that in general. Be more specific if you can. You usually have some good insight when I see you post.

I mean I don't think it a purely binary thing. It us similar to "are you a good person?" People fall somewhere on the spectrum; some closer to one end or the other.

Outside of people far on the ASD spectrum or with 0 social skills, pretty much everyone lies at some point. There are some people who are honest and very seldom lie, there are some people who lie every time their mouth is open.

If you're having a friendly conversation with someone you just met and they showed you their baby and said "isn't s/he so cute?" Most people would say "yes" just out of social etiquette... I know some tough guy is gonna say "not me bro, I'd tell her that her baby is hideous!".... shaddap!

I try to he truthful, and if I do lie it is necessary.